Aqua Teen Adventures - Premiere Online Source for Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode 57 - Boost Mobile

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Frylock: All right, let me see what we got here, hmm, bill $2,600--$2,600! What the--! [Meatwad slams the front door and locks it] Hey! Hey, open the damn door! Hey, open the damn door, man!
Meatwad: What?
Frylock: Open the door!
Meatwad: What?
Frylock: Will you open this door?
Meatwad: Hang on, hang on. Do what?
Frylock: Open the damn door man! Hey!
Meatwad: Oh, okay.

boostmobile1.mp3

Meatwad: Oh, I'm sorry I didn't hear you. I was featherin'.
Frylock: Featherin? Featherin' what?!
Meatwad: My hair, boy.
Frylock: You don't have hair!
Meatwad: (cries)
Frylock: Oh, don't cry don't cry. Stop--stop Meatwad. You have hair. You have hair! Look, see look! Beautiful...brown...sticky wet hair.
Meatwad: Oh thank you. Don't mess with it.

Master Shake: Hey hey! Where you at, dawg? We got the whole city behind ya.
Frylock: Uh, Shake, you wanna tell me how the hell we have a $2,600 power bill?
Master Shake: No, I don't!
Phone: Whoa!
Master Shake: But I want to tell you about the chirp.
Phone: Hey, where you at?
Master Shake: Do you need a boost, Frylock? 'Cause Boost Mobile has the boost you need.
Phone: Where you at, dawg?
Frylock: Who is this?
Master Shake: Oh him? Oh. This is the Boost Mobile phone.
Phone: Hey dawg, where you at?
Master Shake: You know exactly where you at, Frylock, with the GPS enabled feature.
Phone: GPS!
Master Shake: Or, use Boost Wireless Web for national roaming.
Phone: Where you at, dawg?

boostmobile2.mp3

Master Shake: You can be anywhere in the country.. with Boost Mobile.
Meatwad: Hey. Hey, hey. Does that include Jeffy's house? Cause that's where I want to spend the night tonight--with Jeffy.
Master Shake: Hell is home for you! So Frylock...where you at dawg, huh?

Phone: Hey dawg!
Master Shake: The whole city's behind you, man!

boostmobile3.mp3

Frylock: What're you wearing?
Master Shake: Bling blong baby. It represents my lifestyle and stratus as street-savvy irreverant youth who lives large, yet hunger for the next level in life. You know, Boost Mobile is the premium yoth foocus communication network and instant gateway to opportunities. That's the chirp! I gotta take this. Hey, where you at dawg?!

Phone: Hey! Where you at, dawg?
Master Shake: (Murmoring) What? (Murmors) So what did I say? Yoth foocused, youth focused, whatever, he's in the shot! He'll get face time, the guy just started, give him a break. God--So nervous! All right, listen, I gotta go. I'll talk to you later, doggy.
Frylock: Who was that?
Master Shake: Frylock, scoot over.
Frylock: I'm moving, don't push me all right?
Master Shake: There we go. All right. Now you over there and you--what're you doin'? Dance! Let's make and receive cellular phone calls with Boost Mobile.

boostmobile4.mp3

Master Shake: Hey, check out Boost Mobile online!
Phone: Shop online!
Master Shake: It's got text messaging..
Phone: Text messaging!
Master Shake: ...games...
Phone: Yeah, we got games!
Master Shake: ..and a molecular transporter!
Phone: No- Shake, I don't remember a molecular transpo--
Master Shake: Yello, dawg. Oh it doesn't have that? Okay. But it still has text messaging, right? Write actual words, with a phone. Heh, heh.

Master Shake: Okay!
Frylock: Say, why don't we see if the Boost Mobile phone wants to go with us to Jeffy's house.
Meatwad: Jeffy's house!
Phone: Jeffy's house?!
Frylock: Yeah, come on everybody, let's go to Jeffy's house right now.
Phone: We goin' to Jeff's hizzy!
Frylock: (Locks phone outside) Shake, I know what you've done, and I don't like it!
Meatwad: Aren't we goin' to Jeffy's house?
Master Shake: That is my cousin! He's my best friend, I have--I haven't seen him since the army like 1000 years ago.
Frylock: Okay, is he your cousin or your friend?
Master Shake: He's both. And I--he's--he'll only stay for like three year commitment, after that we'll see if we'll renew.
Meatwad: Well aren't we goin' to Jeffy's house?

boostmobile5.mp3

Master Shake: Come on dawg, you're into this. You're black. You sound black. Where are you from?
Meatwad: Come on, y'all. When we goin' to Jeffy's house?
Master Shake: Jeffy the garden hose? You know what? BING. I just killed Jeffy with my mind. (Meatwad cries)

Master Shake: Yes!
Meatwad: (Cries)
Frylock: Meatwad, Meatwad, Jeffy's alive, he's alive, okay?! We'll go see him later. (Phone crashes through window)
Master Shake: Hey dawg! Where you been at?
Phone: Outside, with your man Josh.
Master Shake: Josh?!

boostmobile6.mp3

Master Shake: Josh! Yeah, yeah I know. Sorry for the mix up pal. I do, yes. I do like my balls. No, there is absolutely no need to hand them to me in front of the New York sales team. I--yes. You got it. Okay, buddy. You sound thinner, did you lose weight? Okay, great. Okay, thanks. Bye. ...shmuck.

Master Shake: Oh no you didn't!
Meatwad: Oh, dang. Listen to that beat. They're in there gettin' their groove on, ain't they?
Frylock: Yep, they're dancin' up a storm all right.
Meatwad: So why am I out here with you?
Frylock: You wanted to see Jeffy. See? He's alive. There's Jeffy.
Meatwad: He's a damn garden hose, boy. Come on! Look at you talkin' to it. You a fool.
Carl: What the hell is this here? Some uh, some sort of gay out?

boostmobile7.mp3

Master Shake: Heyy, just the guy I wanted to see. Carl, who's your cellular service provider, huh?
Carl: Dude, what're you dancing about, here? You're poor.
Master Shake: Come here, I want you to listen to something. (chirp) You hear the chirp? Isn't that clear?
Carl: Isn't it clear that I'm gonna just completely f*** your ass up if you don't take three steps back? It's not is it? You just look at me. Look at him lookin' at me.
Master Shake: But you can make and receive cellular calls with this. Give it to him.
Phone: Where you at, dawg?
Master Shake: See?
Carl: I'm on my land. We're both in America which used to be a good country until they started letting people like you do whatever you want.
Phone: Hey, dawg. Where you at?!
Master Shake: See?
Carl: See this. This line here? Line of death. You cross it, and your freedoms no longer exist. Okay? Have a good day.

Phone: Where you at, Dawg?!
Frylock: Shake, how long is this phone gonna be here?
Master Shake: With Boost Mobile, you pay as you go. No contracts, no bills. No hassle. Wait, wait--where you goin'? It's such a tight fit for how you roll, dawg! We're east side, west side, outside--
Frylock: Well we're goin' inside.
Meatwad: Wait, are y'all goin' dancing? Hey! I was gonna dance out there.
Master Shake: Oh come on! We were just about to do some hands-free national roaming!

boostmobile8.mp3

Meatwad: You know what I wanna do? Learn how to milk a cow.
Frylock: Okay.

Master Shake: Wait, wait, wait, wait! Where you goin', dawg?!
Frylock: Well, I'm gonna teach Meatwad how to milk a cow.
Meatwad: I'm gonna learn how to milk a cow!
Master Shake: All right, that's not very urban. Uh. Hey! Maybe we could take it to the Ludacris concert, huh? Or we can watch, like, Sanford and Son will be on in like 15 minutes.
Frylock: No, we're going to a farm to milk a cow.
Master Shake: Well that's not really the message we hope to convey here.
Meatwad: But it's the milk that I hope to drink.
Master Shake: All right, well uh, we're gonna come to because you might need to make or receive a cellular call.
Meatwad: Where is this farm?
Frylock: So how's the reception back there.
Master Shake: Solid, dawg!
Meatwad: Where is this farm, boy?
Frylock: How about now?
Master Shake: Lovin' it, all bars baby! (In hell) Har-dee-har-har. A little hot?!
Meatwad: Where is this farm?!
Frylock: We're 3000 miles below the Earth's surface, Meatwad. A cow would melt under these conditions.
Master Shake: Why you gotta be a player hater?
Phone: Man, I think I'm outta my zone, I'm not feelin' good.
Master Shake: Oh no! He's losing reception!
Frylock: Really, well then we'll just have to keep goin' then, huh?
Master Shake: No, we can't do that!
Phone: Somebody call Josh.
Master Shake: This is a friend of mine and we're outside his cellular coverage! He could die down here without a signal! Hey! Where you at, Josh?
Phone: Shake, you're not comin' in clear no more.
Master Shake: Yeah, where you at? You're breakin'-- you're breakin' up on me, babe. (Go further!) What?
Phone: Touch my screen man, I feel--
Master Shake: Hello? Hello?

boostmobile9.mp3

Frylock: It's dead. No signal.
Master Shake: Okay, but that was pretty fun, right? Don't look at me like that. I'll buy you anything you want. See this chain? I'm rich, bitch.

Frylock: You whored us out to some cell phone company, didn't you?
Master Shake: You say that like it's bad--
Frylock: It is!
Master Shake: But when you do it, it's great.
Frylock: Turn around, Meatwad, before we all burst into flames.
Meatwad: When we gonna learn how to milk a cow?
Frylock: Oh Meatwad, we just did. Don't you remember?
Meatwad: Oh. Oh yeah. Yeah, that was fun. Now, find me a jukebox with Shawn Cassidy on it.
Frylock: Okay, but that's back at the house.
Master Shake: Okay, no, no, no, we can't go there. There gonna so be lookin' for me and Josh said if I screw this up, two important pieces of my body will be yanked out and re-situated elsewhere. I do want children someday!
Frylock: It's over Shake!
Master Shake: Okay, okay. I'll end it. Just let me do it my way.

Master Shake: Hey! More Boost Mobile phones! Where you at, dawgs?!
Phone: Where you at?
Frylock: This is your way of ending this?
Master Shake: Don't put words in my mouth!

boostmobile10.mp3

Master Shake: Well, where you goin', dawg?
Frylock: Well, I'm gonna roll..with my homies...on Lakeshore, yeah that's right.
Master Shake: That's just where we were going!
Frylock: And if we have some time, we might even... get some hos..
Meatwad: And snuggle with 'em, and give 'em a kissy kiss. Cause theys good girls, even though they hos.

Master Shake: Come on dawgs, let's roll!
Phone: Bitches and hoes baby!
Frylock: Now Meatwad!
Meatwad: Uuuggh! (Throws a huge boulder on the pitfall)
Master Shake: Nooo!!
Frylock: Yes! Now let's go inside and get some sleep!
Master Shake: Okay. (Phone) A landline?! Oh God, oh God, oh God. Don't answer it.
Meatwad: Oh yeah, Josh. How you doin'? Yeah, I'm his roommate. Yeah, he's here. Hang on.
Master Shake: I'm not here, I'm not here, I am not here, I am not here. I'm nowhere here. I'm not here, I'm not here, I'm not here.
Meatwad: Jooosshh!!
Master Shake: Hey. Where uh--where you at, dawg? Yes. I'm really sorry about that. My checks have cleared so my hands are unfortunately tied at this point. What? Okay, I gotta put the phone--hold. It has vibra-call alert and downloadable ringtones! Oh come on, man. Do you realize I'm an action hero and that I don't have time for this crap? Yes, I said crap. That's what it is, crap! (Many phones appear)
Phone: Hey, where you at, dawg?!
Master Shake: Whoa, you do have molecular transporters. Wow! Downloadable switchblades, huh? That's a new feature--oh no! (Gets attacked by phones)
Axe: Hey! It's Axe Body Spray. Where are the girls?
Meatwad: Nah, there ain't no girls, here..

boostmobile11.mp3

Meatwad: Can I help you, though?
Axe: Uh, yeah. Are you the milkshake guy?
Frylock: Uh, no. He's down there.
Meatwad: Gettin' his ass whooped on!
Axe: Is that gonna be long?
Meatwad: All night! Can I getcha something?
Axe: No, no. I'm good. I'm in the credits.