Aqua Teen Adventures - Premiere Online Source for Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode 52 - Dusty Gozongas

Click on the filename above the transcription to download the clip. Enjoy!

dustygozongas1.mp3

Pizza Alien: You guys order 50 million pizzas?
Ignignokt: Yes, but by my count, you are 1.3 seconds late.
Pizza Alien: Oh, man. That means they're free.
Ignignokt: Yes, it does, and you are free to go. Leave the pie.
Pizza Alien: Hang on, hang on. I'm gonna call my manager. (Door closes on him) Ahhh, my hand! My hand!
Err: I love pizza, man.

dustygozongas2.mp3

Frylock: What smells so funny?
Master Shake: You farted.
Meatwad: We got us a big old gas leak, don't we?
Master Shake: Yeah, from your butt that you farted out. You got a paper mill in your butt makin' stationary down there.
Frylock: It's natural gas, Shake.
Master Shake: Yeah, natural from his ass.
Meatwad: Nuh uh. He who smelt it dealt it.

Master Shake: Yeah, that's right Frylock.
Meatwad: Fox smells his own hole!
Frylock: (Looks out window) What the hell is that?
Master Shake: I thought you'd never ask. Behold the power of the games! (lights pipe) See?
Frylock: See what?
Master Shake: Now we can host the Olympics, fool! Come on, man!
Frylock: No! No! (Liquid shoots out his eyes to put out flame)
Master Shake: Where'd you get those- those are awesome!
Meatwad: Hey! Is this here an Olympic?
Master Shake: Yes. They will be viewed from space, creating the shape of a black child's hand petting a dove. In the spirit of.. you know, light it up!
Frylock: No, Shake!
Master Shake: Yes, Frylock! (Flames seen from space, Frylock begins clogging pipes) What a whopping way to f*** it up. You know I was this close to landing a huge deal with Sprite and you totally blew it for me.
Frylock: Alright, now, somebody from the city should be here any minute to take care of all this.
Master Shake: Oh, right. The city. Yeah, well, that brain trust seemed to have no use for my plans.
Frylock: Oh yeah? And what was your plan?
Master Shake: My plan.. I will.. Plans just go into details that I don't need to know because they're all crap. I'm talkin' about vision, that I have with my eyes.
Frylock: All right, here comes the truck. Now, they're gonna wanna know who did this, and since you seem to be so proud of it--
Master Shake: I may seem that way but...I'm not here!

Dusty: Who are you guys?
Carl: Thank you God! Thank- thank you God!
Master Shake: Go back to your house, Carl! You don't know what's going on out here.

dustygozongas3.mp3

Master Shake: What seems to be the trouble here little lady?
Dusty Gozongas: It smells funny here.
Meatwad: Yep, Shake says I got a paper mill comin' out my butt and that I smell like Louisiana.
Master Shake: Come on, why would you say that to this lady with the big boobs? You don't have an income like I do and you've never even ridden in my amazing rocket car.
Dusty Gozongas: You have a rocket car?
Master Shake: Yeah, if I get bored, maybe I'll bench press it for ya.

dustygozongas4.mp3

Carl: You're uh.. You're frickin' uh.. Dusty Gozongas! I've seen your billboard on the interstate, you dance out at the uh..Wild Wild Chest!
Meatwad: No, you thinkin' of that girl down at Funbag Junction. That's Busty Bazookas.
Master Shake: I think you're talking about Nipple Hut!
Carl: You're thinkin' Crotch Town.
Master Shake: Crotch Town?
Meatwad: Crotch Town?!
Carl: Yeah, it's near Boobburg, but Boobburg..eh.. kinda weak.

Dusty's Radio: Dusty, what's your 20?
Dusty: What is my name?
Meatwad: You're Dusty Gozongas.
Dusty: That's my name! Heh heh.
Carl: I friggin knew it, I had you pegged! Wild Wild Chest, right?
Dusty: Yeah! I freelance there sometimes. That's how I got this job. I'm good at working.
Carl: Look, my mom just sent me $80. Can I sign a check over to you?
Frylock: Uh, excuse me for breakin' this up, but I think she's here to fix this gas main.
Dusty: What? Uh ho, I don't know how to do that.
Frylock: Well look I thought-- You don't work for the city?
Dusty: Why, does it say that somewhere?
Frylock: On your sh-shirt.
Dusty: Yes then. I work for the city.
Frylock: Well then fix the damn main, please.
Dusty's Radio: Show us your boobs, come on.
Dusty: (Dances) You guys are cute. Where are you from?
Meatwad: Back here, that house. That's where I'm from.
Dusty: That's exciting.
Frylock: Yeah, it is.
Carl: It is.
Master Shake: Carl, give me some money.
Frylock: This is bulls***
Carl: I know, what is this? Drop your drawers!
Dusty: I don't know how to fix anything.
Carl: Oh, don't get so down on yourself. Can you get down on yourself?
Dusty: You're cute!
Frylock: Will you stop prancing around? This is a family neighborhood!
Meatwad: We a family. Keep dancing.
Frylock: Now do you need to call your supervisor, or do you want me to do it for you?
Dusty: Okay, let me get my phone thingy. I uh...might need someone to help me with it.
Carl: ME!
Master Shake: ME!!
Frylock: No, no! Get back!
Master Shake: Oh Frylock!
Carl: Fryman! C'mon man!
Dusty: (Holds wrench to side of her head) Hello? Anyone out there? (shakes wrench) Is this thing on? Hello? Wilco Roger. Hm, this isn't working.
Frylock: Maybe you should use the walkie talkie.
Carl: Hey, what are we doing here? You know, I got a phone, up in my bedroom. C'mon! I won't lock you in. C'mon, please, follow me!
Frylock: Carl, go inside.
Carl: What? You don't like wom--

dustygozongas5.mp3

Carl: What are all these numbers doin' on my house?
Master Shake: The award platform. That's where the athletes get their medals. Drr.
Carl: Hey, you hear that Dusty? We're having the olympics here! Come on in with me, let me show you where the pole vault competition is. Hahah, I'm so... I'm so lonely.

Dusty: Okay!
Frylock: No, you have to go.
Dusty: Okay. I have to go now. (Holds wrench up to her ear) Job over, over and out! Now call us if you need anything, and I mean anything!
Frylock: Oh yeah, I need to get your wrench number. What is that, anyway, huh?
Dusty: That's funny. You're funny.
Master Shake: Well. Everybody see that? I just got laid!
Frylock: You didn't get laid.
Master Shake: Well... how would you know?
Frylock: Uh...I don't.

dustygozongas6.mp3

Carl: So uh... we really gettin' the Olympics or..
Frylock: Carl, what do you think?
Carl: Yes?
Frylock: No.
Carl: Is this latex or oil based?
Master Shake: Manure! Horse manure to be specific.
Carl: Yeah... alright..

Master Shake: (Sawing his recliner) YEAH! I NEED YOU TO SEND SOMEONE OUT-- WHAT? WHAT? HANG ON. (Turns off chainsaw) All right, what I need you to do is get off your duff and get Dusty Gozongas over to my house today, (Phone murmors) Because I just chainsawed my chair to a hundred pieces!
Voice on phone: It has to be water, sewage or electrical.
Master Shake: Gotta be related to Water, sewage or electricity, huh? Can you hold on a second? (Saws electrical wires) Okay, the power just went out..hello? Hello?
Frylock: What just happened to the power?
Master Shake: ...I dunno.
Frylock: You don't know?!
Master Shake: What do you think happened to it?
Frylock: All right, Shake, what, do you expect me to believe that the chainsaw just sprouted legs and cut through the transformer all by itself?
Master Shake: Would you..do you believe that?
Frylock: (Calls City) Uh yeah, we have a problem with our power line, and apparently--
Master Shake: Tell 'em about the chainsaw that sprouted legs! Make sure we get the X-Files here!
Frylock: So..did you get all that?
Master Shake: Hang on! Send Dusty Gozongas over here, immediately! Wait wait wait wait. Tell her I love her...but that I'm a man and I gotta be free so she's gotta be responsible for birth control. Daddy's gettin' some pudding tonight!

Master Shake: She's here! She'll be propelled by her own sex drive, but tell her to follow the rose petals. (Stuffing socks in front of thong) Hang on! Just..just one second!
Meatwad: Put this in there! (Holds up baseball bat) Make her scared of it.
Master Shake: (With camcorder) Okay, shut up, now remember I got no battery in this thing, so you gotta get the money shot! I already been laid before, I know how it works. This is for you...and everyone on the internet. Remember your job is education
Meatwad: I know, I know. You the laymaster.
Master Shake: (Puts bat in thong, jumps on bed) Come on in lover... I'm just sitting in here, you know, wearing a mask and tickling myself with an ostrich feather. Ho ho ho! Huhhh..
Andre: Your power's back on. Hey can I have one of those strawberries?
Master Shake: No! Get outta here!
Meatwad: Aw, did you just get laid? How'd it go down? Tell it from the beginning.
Master Shake: Meatwad, please. I don't kiss and tell. Frylock, she was here and I got laid again!
Frylock: Well, that's funny. I just saw Dusty go into Carl's house.
Master Shake: No!

dustygozongas7.mp3

Carl: Oh, thank you so much for comin' over. See, I can't get the lights to go on in here.
Dusty Gozongas: It could be broken.
Carl: Maybe it is!
Dusty Gozongas: I think it's broken.
Carl: Well, there's this thing here, but you know I don't know what this is. It could be related.
Dusty Gozongas: Oh, that's definitely a switchy..swi.. a switch!
Carl: You think that this "switch" as you call it, is somehow related to my light problem?
Dusty Gozongas: Oh, definitely not. Well.. it could be. I think you're right. We could try it!
Carl: Oh, you should try it. You're so much better.. ya know, than I am at this.
Dusty Gozongas: Oky doky.. here goes! (Flips switch and Carl is in thong with camera)
Carl: Heyy!! Look at that, you're a TV star! Hey, can I get you somethin'? You wanna uh.. funnel some liquor?

Master Shake: You tramp!
Carl: Hey hey hey hey hey! Easy! This is a lady here! You want me to go up with it, baby? Okay. There we go.
Master Shake: Carl, you gotta know when to face facts, brother. Read the signs. She's ain't into you.
Carl: She's in my house, so uh, do the math.
Master Shake: She may be in your house, but I'm the one wearing your thong! And I also got your ostrich feather!
Dusty: Oh guys, don't fight over me!
Carl: Baby, I would fight the KISS ARMY for you!
Master Shake: I'm in KISS!
Dusty: No touching. (Sprays them with pepper spray)
Carl: Oh God, that stings, that hurts!
Dusty: Okie dokie, I finished the job! Over and out, Roger Wilco!
Master Shake: Where ya going?! Don't go, don't go!
Carl: I gotta tell ya, freakin' cute when she tries to talks into that wrench, you know. Like she's gonna..lick it or do something erotic to it.
Master Shake: Yeah, I'll miss that about her.

Dusty: who are you guys?
Wrench #1: This pole is... malfunctioning. Perhaps if you were to dance around it.
Dusty: All these lights...is this Pennsylvania?
Wrench #2: Yes!
Dusty: I've never been to Pennsylvania!

Meatwad: I can't believe y'all let a silly woman get between you and your friendship.
Frylock: Especially one that doesn't even know who you are.
Master Shake: Disgusting, isn't it? Breaks my heart that I have to sue his ass back to the stone age-
Carl: I'm right here, Shake! You wanna go right now, we'll go right now!
Master Shake: C'mon, fat boy!
Carl: Where are you?!
Meatwad: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Break it up, guys, and listen to me.

dustygozongas8.mp3

Meatwad: Love's a wonderous thing. But there's more to it than the physical experience. Like... Like.. Oh, hell, I don't know. She has some tig old bitties didn't she?
Frylock: Yeah, she did.
Carl: Amen to that.

Dusty: Is it working yet?
Wrench #1: It still needs more... maintenance.
Wrench #2: Yes!
Wrench #1: Perhaps if you were to thrust into it--
Wrench #2: Yes!
Wrench #1: Or crawl around it on all fours like...an animal.
Wrench #2: Yes!
Wrench #1: Like you comin' to get me like--like I've been bad. But you need to look at me.
Wrench #2: Yes!
Dusty: Is that Pennsylvania?
Wrench #2: Yes!