Aqua Teen Adventures - Premiere Online Source for Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode 49 - Robositter

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Oglethorpe: Oh, dammit! He hung up again.
Ignignokt: Hello?
Oglethorpe: Yes, don't hang up. You may think I just called but I didn't. I'm looking for Mike. His last name is Hunt? Does he live there? Heheh.
Ignignokt: I can't pronounce his name. You do it.
Oglethorpe: You get it? Michael Hunt! Hahah!
Ignignokt: He doesn't live here, you have the wrong number.
Oglethorpe: That's right I do! They are so mad that someone keeps calling them and asking for wrong information!

robositter1.mp3

Oglethorpe: Hello??
Err: How ya doin'? Yeah, look um.. My name is..biff and I'm looking for Holden McGroin.
Oglethorpe: Well, I don't think so, but I'll ask. Do we know a Holden McGroin?
Emory: No, man.
Oglethorpe: No, I'm sorry ma'am.
Err: Well, how about Oliver Clothesoff?
Oglethorpe: How about an Oliver Clothesoff? (Emory Chuckles) Nope, him neither. Why don't you leave a message and if I see him I'll leave it for him.
Emory: Just hang up, man.
Ignignokt: Yes, if you could just give him this message that he should (beep) off. Whoever you are, you can (beep) off, too.
Oglethorpe: Well, that's a rude message. Wait, who is this?
Ignignokt: This is who this is. (reveals self on screen)
Oglethorpe: Suck on this! (throws something at screen)

Emory: Well that's just great..

Master Shake: Any idea where the Steak-umms are?
Frylock: I ate the last one for breakfast.
Master Shake: Oh that's great, oh for breakfa-- you don't say, well that's wonderful. So uh.. what in the hell am I supposed to eat now?!
Frylock: Nothing. You'll just have to hold on until I can pawn this TV for some food money.
Master Shake: Ho, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold it, no way! We are fed by the government and you know that!
Frylock: Look, Shake, we're gonna have to get jobs.
Master Shake: What, are you nuts? What about that big fat welfare check we get every month.
Frylock: It doesn't come until next Thursday. Now either I pawn this TV, or we're not going to have money for food.
Master Shake: Well we're detectives! Remember? Remember?

robositter2.mp3

Master Shake: I made the t-shirts, I bought the t-shirt cannon remember? I've been firing t-shirts all over the neighborhood that say we're detectives! Now we're going to look like fools.

Frylock: We haven't detected anything in over three years, Shake!
Master Shake: Well, I detect some anger in your voice. Now pay me, I need to eat! I need some Steak-umms!

robositter3.mp3

Meatwad: Good morning! I'll have me two Steak-umms.
Master Shake: You're about to learn the value of a hard...day's night! Because you need to get out there and start working on a job!

Meatwad: That'd be a violation of child labor laws.
Frylock: Well, he is right. He's too young. Uh, besides, there are sanitation issues.
Meatwad: That's right.

robositter4.mp3

Meatwad: This hand, been up my butt. But I touch the food all day long with it.
Master Shake: Well, your congressman will know about how..bull crap this is!

robositter5.mp3

Frylock: Shake, either I pawn this TV, or we get a job.
Master Shake: All right. Well, just plug that in and lemme think about it. Some of my best thinkin' has been done with the TV on.

Master Shake: So plug it in. Just put the two prongs in the holes. I don't watch it I just need to--- (explodes)

robositter6.mp3

Master Shake: What the hell's this? I told you! Fireman, astronaut, race car driver, maybe bikini judge... and this is what I get? Food service?!

Master Shake: Are you kidding me? This is third world, and I'm from the first! I'm number one, baby.
Frylock: I'm amazed that they even hired you.
Master Shake: No one else will do it, they're taking that chance! And then, if something goes down, which it will, I will sue the corporate office so badly!
Frylock: Look, Shake, we're about to get the lunch crowd so help me liquify this pork roast.
Master Shake: Disgusting. That's what we do here?!
Frylock: Yeah, see, you just put this roast on that press.
Master Shake: God no!
Frylock: And then..
Master Shake: You gotta be kidding me! You don't pull out the bone?!
Frylock: No, there's a lot of calcium in that. You-- You didn't read the orientation booklet?
Master Shake: All I read are the zeroes on my paycheck.
Frylock: Look, okay, I'll do this. Why don't you go and give out free shots of that ham.
Master Shake: (Throws up) That was ham in that pitcher?!
Frylock: No, that was fried chickwit.
Master Shake: Who friggin' thought of this place?!

Carl: Ha ha! Yeah. oh, man. She is it. you are it, baby. Yeah. shake them buns.
Frylock: Hey, carl, we're home. We brought you back some brat-thirst.
Master Shake: Get it? Brat-thirst? you got to drink the sausage.
Carl: Yeah, I'm watching my show, so I tell you what. set it over there in the trash.
Frylock: So how was Meatwad today, Carl?

robositter7.mp3

Carl: I dunno.
Frylock: What do you mean? Did he get into trouble? Did he break something?
Carl: I don't know!
Frylock Well you were watching him, weren't you?
Carl: Yeah, I watched him help himself to the medicine cabinet. Heheh. 1 down.. 2 to go! Hahah!

Carl: What?! I got things to do here. I got all day to jack around. I mean, I do that. I make time for it, but uh, I got schedules.
Frylock: Meatwad!
Master Shake: Don't tell me he's dead. Please don't!

robositter8.mp3

Carl: Hey, your welfare check come in yet?
Master Shake: Payment will be received upon discovery of the body. You know the contract.

Frylock: Meatwad, are you in here? Meatwad!
Meatwad: I'm harmony, and these are some good jellybeans, man.
Frylock: Meatwad, put those down!
Meatwad: No one is here by that name. You're speaking to the all-being formerly known as Meatwad.
Frylock: Let me see your eyes. are your pupils dilated?
Meatwad: But I still handle his messages.
Frylock: Stick out your tongue, let me see it.
Meatwad: Join me, brother.
Frylock: You're not supposed to be able to open these.
Meatwad: You don't want to open the mind, open the doors of percept--
Frylock: Meatwad, look at me. Meatwad, look at me.
Meatwad: You come here to kill me! Bullfrog king!
Frylock: Meatwad!
Master Shake: All right. just step back, please. The drugs are making him paranoid. He could leap out at you at any minute. I know how to deal with it, but, you--

robositter9.mp3

Master Shake: I know you're on drugs! You're in big trouble! I'm calling the police, right now!

Frylock: Look. we can't leave him alone here anymore.
Master Shake: That's why I'm taping the fridge shut. We'll know exactly where he is at all times--in the fridge. e's got food in there. he'll be fine. what?
Frylock: I guess we need some sort of sitter.
Master Shake: I'll be here. I'm sick. I will be sick tomorrow.

Narrator: Yeah. don't do this, idiot. Wait a minute. is we on, man?

Master Shake: Where you goin'? Costume party?
Frylock: To work. where's your uniform?

robositter10.mp3

Master Shake: I proved a point, okay. I did it, I worked. What're you gonna do? Sell out to the man? Well, I'll be here. Keepin' it real.

Frylock: Well, you keep it real with your vest buttoned today, buddy, because Ken is coming by, and I want to win that rain poncho.
Master Shake: Whoa! ok. All right, but just think. what about Meatwad? He'll be here all alone in the crisper.
Frylock: Oh, I've solved that problem. Uh, you ok, Meatwad?
Meatwad: Um, yeah. I'm just depressed. Plus, I got some freezer burn back here.
Frylock: Well I tell you what, this should cheer you up. I made you this robot, and she's gonna be fun to play with and keep your little ass in line. Meet Robositter.
Master Shake: Robositter? W ow. that's original. Will you please once think outside of the frigging box?
Meatwad: What was--
Master Shake: Robositter? gah!
Meatwad: Hey, what was the name of that movie where the guy is a robot and then the doll was a robot and it had Lance Henriksen?
Master Shake: Yeah. what is that one? Well, that's a good one. use that name.
Meatwad: Yeah. use that name.
Frylock: Robositter, what is your prime directive?
Robositter: To ensure the safety and comfort of Meatwad.

robositter11.mp3

Master Shake: She is pretty hot.. Robositter, how old are you? Are you legal? Rrroowwrrr.
Frylock: Shake!

Master Shake: Get lost. like you never thought of it.
Frylock: I didn't.
Master Shake: Yeah, right.
Frylock: Robositter, what are the rules?
Robositter: In bed by 7:00. no sweets.
Master Shake: Robositter, what will you be wearing to bed?
Frylock: Come on, shake.
Master Shake: What? Throw a bag over those wheels, and I'd do her.
Frylock: We'll be home after 8:00.
Robositter: Directives will be achieved. You have nothing to worry about. Where's your phone?
Meatwad: You can call Candy Land with this one, talk to Gumdrop Larry. You need a calling card made of candy.
Robositter: You are in big trouble. I want the real phone, and I want it now, or I will tear your soul apart!
Meatwad: I'm telling. I'm telling.
Robositter: Tell who? The rage of hell will feast upon you, and I'll make it happen! Hey, Sheila. You would not believe what I think I did today. I was, like, at the mall, and you know who was there? Derek. Grody Derek.
Meatwad: Can I have some Immodium A-D?
Robositter: What did I tell you about the hounds of hell, you retarded mutant?
Meatwad: You said they was gonna get me.
Robositter: You can have a pill. Here, let me help you open them. Go see if they're open.
Meatwad: Okay.
Robositter: Someone broke a window that needs a spanking!
Meatwad: Oh my god!

Master Shake: Hey, I just whipped this up fresh. Try it. it's on me.
Frylock: what is it?
Master Shake: It's my vest, my tie, and my name tag. You drink what I wear.
Frylock: Shake, have you cleaned out those bone traps yet?
Master Shake: No. are you out of your mind? I'm going to the arcade, stop fooling around, will you? Now, where's the change drawer?
Frylock: Nuh-uh. Uh-uh, shake. I'm the only one allowed to work the register.
Master Shake: Then I'll just have to see if they will accept ham. This is my severance.
Frylock: You can't quit, Shake.
Master Shake: But I got Pac-Man fever. Feel my head.
Frylock: Look, Shake. Ken is gonna be here today, and you know--
Master Shake: Yeah. Ken. I know. the district manager. I'm gonna do whatever Ken tells me to do. I quit!
Frylock: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait. Ken says if we sell a dozen drinks, they'll give us a slurp-a-lunch rain poncho complete with logo.
Master Shake: Oh, yeah? Yeah. well, drink this.
Frylock: What is it?
Master Shake: It's the slurp-a-lunch rain poncho complete with logo. I got it when I kicked in the door to the prize cage. I'm gone, brother.
Frylock: Wait a minute, shake.

robositter12.mp3

Frylock: Heyy.. Robosit--. What're you doing wearin' a thong?!
Robositter: All prime directives have been acheived by 4 o'clock.
Frylock: I said 8 o'clock!
Robositter: Umm, well. Robots work twice as fast as humans so I altered the time-space...barrier.

Robositter: To...whatever. I did it. are you calling me a liar?
Frylock: Well no, I just wanted you to stay until 8:00.
Robositter: Whatever.
Frylock: What? Whatev-- why, you--you look like a little tramp in that belly shirt.
Robositter: Come on, Sheila. let's blow.
Frylock: Sheila?
Robositter: Um, I built her. She's my friend, and you have no right to talk to her that way.
Frylock: I'll talk to her mother, then.
Robositter: Her mother lets her do whatever she wants because she's divorced and she gets full custody.
Frylock: Wait a minute, I thought you said you built her.
Robositter: Uh, doy. I built her mother and father, and then I made them get divorced.
Frylock: Well, sheila, does your mother know that--
Sheila: My brother says it's pathetic that you work at slurp-a-lunch.
Frylock: I am assistant manager.
Robositter: We want our baby-sitting money because we're gonna get tattoos just above the crack of our robot asses.
Frylock: All right. Fine. the money is in there.
Robositter: You look like a total dork in that hat. Thanks a lot for sending me once again to-- aah!
Frylock: You're liquified, bitch.
Sheila: Hey, um, that was, like, not very cool. Aah!
Master Shake: Where are-- where are those girls? Did you give them the money already?
Frylock: Does it look like it?
Master Shake: I was supposed to buy them wine coolers.

robositter13.mp3

Meatwad: So it's either you definitely should not play with matches, or you definitely should.
Carl: It's definitely one or the other.
Meatwad: Which one do you think it is, Carl?