Aqua Teen Adventures - Premiere Online Source for Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode 41 - The Cloning

Click on the filename above the transcription to download the clip. Enjoy!

thecloning1.mp3

Steve: Yeah.. listen we would love to make the ice cream social..but uh..
Ignignokt: But what Steve?
Err: Yeah, lie to us.
Steve: We've kinda gotten behind at work.
Dr Weird: We have become ONE!

thecloning2.mp3

TV: This is your left, that's your left, this is your left, that's your left! This is your right, that's your right, this is your right. You're gonna' die!
Meatwad: Dang. This is some good TV

Meatwad: Hey, hey wake up.

thecloning13.mp3

Meatwad: You're missing some good TV.
Master Shake: (Wakes up) Change it.
Meatwad: I ain't changin' this. This is the best!
Master Shake: Change it.
Meatwad: To what?! Come on, this is good.
Master Shake: Why don't we let the arrow decide.
Meatwad: No, don't do that! Oh come on!
Master Shake: (shoots TV with flaming arrow) And now it's changed. The change-ling.

Frylock: What was that?!
Master Shake: What do you think it was?!
Meatwad: It was you boy.
Master Shake: What the-

thecloning3.mp3

Master Shake: Hey, this closet was full of TVs last time I checked and now there's none!
Meatwad: Cause you keep breakin' 'em!
Master Shake: Cause you keep pissing me off so bad! You should be lucky I'm thoughtful enough to throw the anger at the media and not your buttocks!

Frylock: Both of you, get in here!!

thecloning4.mp3

Frylock: Everytime you break a TV, Shake, where do you think they come from, huh?
Master Shake: Jesus.
Meatwad: No! It's Santa Claus.
Master Shake: It's the same thing!
Meatwad: Ain't no Santa Claus. I know. I'm Jewish.
Frylock: I've been cloning these TVs for you, Shake.
Meatwad: ...from this day forward.

Frylock: And you know what? I'm tired of doing it.
Master Shake: You have a cloner?!
Frylock: You know I have a cloner.
Master Shake: Oh, yeah.
Meatwad: You have a cloner?!
Master Shake: Say, can I borrow your cloner?
Frylock: No! I use that thing for research. It's not your own personal electronics store.
Master Shake: Okay, you're-you're absolutely right. We are very sorry.
Meatwad: That was a one time thing.
Master Shake: You know what? That's what I was just thinking. And we mean it this time.
Frylock: (Sighs) Okay. But this is the last one!
Master Shake: That one? That better not have been the last one!
Frylock: Fine! F*** it, Shake. Enjoy one of my books, then!
Master Shake: Alright, now, come on, come on! We'll be good! Come on, now! Don't be that way, why you be so cranky? Please, no books! I can't read, I'm not a loser!

thecloning5.mp3

Meatwad: Yeah, Frylock, please. Make us a TV. I mean look at me. How else am I gonna face the day? I ain't got no job, my wife left me, bills pilin' up, I got child support payments, and I have no idea if what I said's true. But I believe it.
Master Shake: He is right.
Meatwad: We needs to dull our senses.

Frylock: Alright, fine. I'll do one more, but that is it!
Meatwad: All right! TV!
Master Shake: You'll do them til the living end, staring James Bond.
Frylock: Shake, look. I've abused this thing too much as it is. If you clone something too many times, the molecular structure starts to breaks down, and there's no telling what you're gonna get!
Meatwad: Just get the TV.
Master Shake: Ugh. You and your quasi-intellectual hob-knobbery blah blah-- You know what makes me sick? That you get away with it!
Frylock: You just be more careful with that, because it's the last one.
Master Shake: Oh really?
Meatwad: Yeah, says who, boy?
Master Shake: Oh yeah, big man. Oh, you'll make more of these 'cause I'll tell you to right to your face--
Meatwad: Yeah, you tell him.
Master Shake: --Frylock!
Meatwad: He's gone, right?

thecloning14.mp3

Meatwad: Whoa damn. Did you just see that?!
Master Shake: No, we didn't see it. Everything's fine. Now just shut up and I'll--just go control it.
Meatwad: Damn! Did you just see that?!
Master Shake: I'm not in the business of seeing whatever pleases you..

Master Shake: Get back here you son of a--!

thecloning6.mp3

Meatwad: Well I'm in business (To himself) Business of kicking your ass. And let me tell you, business is booming. I'm open for business. Business is giving you the business.... up your butt. (Sees Shake watching him). Did you hear me say that?
Master Shake: You looking to expand your buisness?
Meatwad: Business is closed! Business is closed!

thecloning15.mp3

Master Shake: That's what you call taking command of the situation! Meatwad, you turn it on.
Meatwad: I ain't goin' near that TV boy, I think that thing's alive!
Master Shake: Go over there, get close to it and touch it to turn it on!
Meatwad: What'll you give me?
Master Shake: Six months to a year, and brother you are dead!
Meatwad: All right...

Master Shake: Come on, man, we're wasting time!
Meatwad: Dude, just give me a second, here.
Master Shake: Turn it on!
Meatwad: I'm getting to it, I'm getting to it. Just don't wake it up. I want to surprise it. Look at that!
Master Shake: Yes, I see that.
Meatwad: Look at that there, you on the TV!
Master Shake: Well, yeah I've been on TV a lot. See this, oh this is, yeah sure this is my sitcom a--
Evil Shake: I'm in your house...
Master Shake: --with a science fiction horror twist. It's called... uh..
Meatwad: What's it called?
Master Shake: I don't know, shut up, I'm trying--I'm trying to learn my lines. What the hell is this?
Meatwad: Well you said this is your sitcom with the sci-fi horror twist. That's never been done before.
Master Shake: Yeah, I know. I just don't remember filming this episode. I can tell my instincts are strong in this scene though, and I got a lot of motivation.
Meatwad: But you in Frylock's room. You ain't supposed to be in there, why'd you film in there?
Evil Shake: Call me. Heheheh..

thecloning7.mp3

Meatwad: Where did you get all that money?!
Master Shake: Well obviously I am a drug lord in this scene. Where the hell else do you think a guy like me gets this amount of cash.

Master Shake: Ohh! The cloner! Give me a dollar, quick!
Meatwad: Okay, look, my grandmother gave me this dollar before she died, it's my birthday dollar--
Master Shake: Thank you granny! You spent it well, baby!
Meatwad: Hey bitch!
Master Shake: Just watch the TV, you'll forget!
Meatwad: Forget what?!

Evil Frylock: Shake, what'd I tell you about messing with my cloner?
Evil Shake: Frylock, I am so sorry about it. I--you know, I really should've taken your feelings into consideration.
Meatwad: Awww.
Evil Frylock: No, look man. I'm the one who's sorry, okay? I'm sorry I made the cheerleading squad and you didn't.
Evil Shake: It's OK. You were the better cheerleader.
Evil Frylock: Well, I wasn't no slouch. Did you see me do those cartwheels?
Meatwad: I identify with that.
Evil Shake: Okay, okay, don't rub it in.
Meatwad: There's the zinger!
Evil Frylock: OK, then how about I blow it in?
Evil Shake: Wha -
Meatwad: Shake! Damn!
Master Shake: What do you want?!
Meatwad: Um, nothing. You just uh, do what you's doin'. It's all good.
TV Gnome: Hey, great news, you both made the cheerleading squad! (Evil Frylock shoots guy) Ahhh!
Meatwad: (Changes channel to Meatwad dancing with others) This here's what I like; a good reality show!

thecloning8.mp3

Evil Meatwad: Oh, hey Frylock!
Meatwad: Oh no! Frylock!
Evil Frylock: Oh, hey Meatwad. Look what I got.
Meatwad: Don't let him in!
Evil Meatwad: Well come on in!
Meatwad: All right, he's in but just don't ask him to dance.
Evil Meatwad: Do you wanna dance?
Evil Frylock: I'd love to dance!!
Meatwad: You asked him to dance! I told you not to ask him to dance!
Evil Frylock: You shut up!
Meatwad: Oh, God. Huh.. Well. Maybe this is a different show.
Evil Frylock: Hey, anybody want some metal candy? (shoots everybody)
Meatwad: It's the same damn show! Run! Run! Run to your chocolate huts!

Evil Frylock: Come on, Meatwad. You're not hungry for some cane?!
Meatwad: Nooooo!!!
Frylock: Meatwad! Meatwad! What is it?
Meatwad: You know exactly what it is. Get away from--get-get away from me. I need evaluation..and dinner. And by dinner, I don't mean gnome heads.
Frylock: Gnome heads?
Meatwad: Yeah somethin'! You know! You done did it!
Frylock: Did what?!
Meatwad: Something's wrong with that TV.
Frylock: There's nothing wrong with that TV. (Blood pours out of it) Okay, something's wrong with the TV. (Tosses out) Ah, that's that.

thecloning9.mp3

Frylock: Oh, hey Carl.
Carl: What, you got another busted TV?
Frylock: Yeah, Something's horribly wrong with it.
Carl: Wow, that's wireless too huh? What do I care, huh? I'm sure someone'll grab it. Whelp, see ya later. (Sneaks back outside) Frickin' awesome.

Frylock: What were you doing in there?
Master Shake: What are you doing home so soon? Answer that!
Frylock: Whoa, what are these bills doing here?
Master Shake: Don't touch them, they're mine!
Frylock: You can't use the cloner to counterfeit money, Shake.
Master Shake: Look, we will discuss this when I feel like it. Right now, I gotta go get a new Camaro, 'cause that's where the s*** is, baby!
Frylock: There are limits to how much you can clone. Matter breaks down over time!
Master Shake: Blah, blah, blah, blah, I'm sorry I'm not fluent in dorkinese!
Frylock: Hmmm, well, on the other hand, I could use this to feed all the hungry children of the world. Yeah, with my new chain of family styled restaurants. Oh, yeah. Oh hell, yeah!

thecloning10.mp3

Frylock: Yeah, I'm busy. What?
Carl: Hey Fryman. Ordinarily I wouldn't call you cause I don't like you, but you're on the TV man! Check out channel..uh..666. That's weird.
Frylock: Look Carl, I don't have time--
Carl: Whooaa!! Hang on, I'm on it now. That is me. Awesome..awesome! Frickin' awesome! I'm on TV! I look pretty good! Chicken skin diet's really payin off for me. (Frylock shoots TV Carl) Oh God. You stay far away from this house. Do you hear me? FAR AWAY!

Narrator: Well, now it's official. Frylock's just as crazy as Shake. Damn!

Master Shake: Hey, Frylock! I decided not to get the Camaro.
Meatwad: Wait, no!
Master Shake: Guess why!
Meatwad: You're--you're dead! Let me try that.
Master Shake: No, you'll break it. This is a very expensive piece of equipment. You think money just grows on trees? No, you have to get it out of the cloner.
Frylock: Get out of here!

thecloning11.mp3

Master Shake: Frylock get away from the money. The genetic structure's breaking down. It needs to be analyzed at the Camaro dealership.

Meatwad: Hey, I want some of that! I provided the seed money.
Master Shake: Here. You tripled your investment. Now take a dirt nap. This is our money!
Frylock: Shake, you take another step towards my money and it'll be your last!
Meatwad: You both back away. I seen what you done on the TV, and I seen what you done to the TV. I ain't afraid to use this.
Frylock: You're holding it backwards.
Master Shake: Here, let me help you. There ya go. Now you're ready to go.
Meatwad: I ain't gonna listen to your lies!
George Washington: I cannot tell a lie. You are holding it backwards.
Master Shake: Who let the hippie in here?! I got news for ya pal, the dead are dead, okay? So maybe what you're looking for is soap which is at the grocery store. Ya know, food you don't have to pick?
Frylock: Shake..
Master Shake: They sell meat there--
Frylock: Uh, Shake--
Master Shake: And while you're at it--
Frylock: Shake!
Master Shake: No! Shut up! I'm talking to him.
Frylock: He's George Washington.
George Washington: (Sighs) I am.
Master Shake: Then what the hell's he doing next to my Benjamins?

thecloning12.mp3

George Washington: I have come bearing a message. Great Britain sought taxes from the colonies, and they paid for their greed with blood. Now, do you understand the price of avarice?
Master Shake: Take 'em out.
George Washington: Wait! NO! (guns fired)

Meatwad: I done took him out didn't I?
Master Shake: Yeah, you really took him out�
Meatwad: I knew I took him out! Hehe, yeah! Hey, did I take him out?
Frylock: I knew we should have cloned twenties. Jackson wouldn't have given a s***.