Aqua Teen Adventures - Premiere Online Source for Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode 37 - Frat Aliens

Click on the filename above the transcription to download the clip. Enjoy!

frataliens19.mp3

Steve: Hey, I'm back from lunch.
Dr. Weird: Where's mine?!
Steve: Umm.. Uh. I thought you said you don't like to eat 'cause you said food makes you really (Dr. Weird rips his own brain out) uh, crazy?
Dr. Weird: This makes me really crazy!!
Dr. Weird's Brain: Get me some fries, boy!

frataliens1.mp3

Carl: (Answering Machine) This is Carl. Leave me a message or, uh, or leave me alone. Either way, I don't care. Unless this is Mom, in which case, happy Mother's Day.
Master Shake: Hey, buddy how's it goin'? Ya know, I just happen to check the PH levels in your pool and they are incredibly high, not good. Fix it or I'm gettin' a lawyer! Okay, Bye!

Frylock: Did you ask him?
Meatwad What'd he say?
Master Shake: Yeah, it's cool. We're all good.
Meatwad Hell yeah!
Carl: Heyyy! Buddy!
Master Shake: You were home the whole time?
Meatwad He don't ever leave the house. He's one of them um, shut offs. Shut-shut out. Wait, what the hell's it called?
Master Shake: It's a shut up!
Meatwad Yeah, it's a shut up.
Master Shake: I never thought you'd screen with me, Carl.
Carl: Oh, I was just lightin' the grill, waitin' for you guys to come over. Have a little barbeque, a little beer.

frataliens2.mp3

Carl: You know I love you guys..
Frylock: Carl, you all right? You're acting strange.
Carl: Noo, I'm not.
Frylock: Yes, you are.
Carl: Come on. Race over here. Last one in is a rotten egg!
Meatwad: Shake's a rotten egg!
Frylock: Whoa..
Meatwad: Boy, that feels hot.
Carl: Ohh, come on! Why'd ya stop? Keep comin'...you're so close!

Meatwad Yeah, well come on.
Frylock: No, no Meatwad! Don't!
Meatwad What?
Carl: Wait for it...

frataliens3.mp3

Carl: Good, it works. Now you try doin' that with your body now.

Meatwad Okay.
Frylock: No, Meatwad stop!

frataliens4.mp3

Master Shake: Carl! Top shelf. Not the high end model, but it works for you and..ya know your.. income bracket. But don't worry, I'm not gonna tell anybody how cheap you are.
Carl: Yeah, come closer there Shake man. You won't tell anybody anything, ever again.

Frylock: Damn that thing is bright.
Carl: Yeah, it better be bright. The dude guaranteed me you could see it from space.

Skeeter DP, that dude totally cut you off, man. Flip him some birdage, big time!
DP: Suck on that, padre! Yeah! You messed with the wrong frat. Oh, he knows it. Yeah you!
Skeeter Yo, yo, yo, yo, Dude, there's no one in there, dude.
DP: Yeah well my Dad totally owns a dealership.
Skeeter Oh hey what's that over there? Oh, sweet. Floor it dude.
DP: What do you think I've been doin'?!

Meatwad I thought we was gonna take turns on this. How come I'm still in the hole and you still uh-- is that the Jeffersons?
Master Shake: Yeah, we traded turns remember?
Meatwad No.
Master Shake: You traded one of your turns for three of my turns and a turn to be named later.
Meatwad Well I tell you this, I'm gonna be pissed if I get over there and he ain't changed the PH in that pool.
Master Shake: No, I'm with you on that one.
Meatwad (Singing) Well we're movin' on up, to the east side

frataliens20.mp3

Frylock: Hey, Carl. If you wouldn't mind, would you please turn your security grid the f*** off so I can get some sleep?
Carl: Hang on, lemme think-- No.

frataliens5.mp3

Skeeter: Dude, you wanna move your thing? You almost killed us.
DP: Yeah, or are you like--are you beggin' me instead to like, mess up your pizza face in front of your girlfriend over there cause I'll do it.
Skeeter: Not worth it, dude. It's not worth it!
DP: Look at my ship, man. My Dad's gonna be pissed.
Skeeter: Dude, do you know who his Dad is? He's totally rich. He will totally hook you up, dude. We're drunk!

Carl: Are these friends of yours, Fryman?
DP: Hey, where's the club? I need to piss.
Carl: They came from space, you know. Typically, that means you're somehow connected.
Frylock: Carl, I've never seen them before in my life.

frataliens16.mp3

DP: So then you don't mind if I talk to her?
Carl: Her? Yeah, knock yourself out. She's a regular ho-bag.
DP: What's up little lady?
Skeeter: Dude, she's got a bit of a 'stache..
DP: 's all right, she's good to go. Hey um, my Dad's like totally rich we own this dealership, and uh, what sorority are you in?
Frylock: Excuse me?! I think you might have me confused with a woman.
Skeeter: Aww, she burned ya dude!
DP: Oh, so you couldn't get into a sorority?
Frylock: I'm a man, all right?
Skeeter: This is beat. Total sausage party...I think.

Skeeter But we're out of here. Come on, DP, let's go.

frataliens6.mp3

DP: Well, what else is open? Besides, your mouth when you're like, kissing on some gay dude, and like, holdin' his like muscles 'cause his arms just are like, wrapped around you. And you feel like so safe 'cause you're like, you know, not that you're gay or nothin' but God you just wanna like, bury yourself in his chest and just live there forever.

Frylock: I'm outta here.
Skeeter: Yo D to the P, come on, I got the munchies.
DP: Hang on.

frataliens7.mp3

DP: Hang on. What's your name babe?
Master Shake: I'm Shake.
DP: Ahh. You wanna take me to your dorm room for a drink or somethin'?
Master Shake: No, but I believe this little lady needs to have a life experience!
DP: Come here.
Meatwad: Whatchu doin' there? Don't kiss me!!
DP: No, it's cool.
Meatwad: Get away from me! You stay outside.. you scare me!
Skeeter: Ohhhh.. rejected!!

Skeeter I said drink all of it ass head!
DP: Lap it up, ass head or you're never getting in. Pledge!
Master Shake: Come on, pledge! Drink up!
Skeeter Dude, come on let's go back to the house I need to eat!
DP: No, this girl totally wants me.
Skeeter Dude, forget it. She was sporting some major LBs.
DP: Hah, it's like a moped, man. Fun to ride until your friends see you.
Meatwad Stop doin' that. Don't knock on this window.

frataliens8.mp3

Master Shake: Hey! How about we have a panty raid? (DP Throws up) Oohh.. okay. Well...finish throwin' up there...

Skeeter Well. See ya tomorrow.

Frylock: Is he still out there?
Meatwad I ain't gonna find out. That old boy tried to kiss me!
Master Shake: Well you know what that means, don't ya?

frataliens9.mp3

Master Shake: Somebody's a little bi-curious!
Meatwad: I ain't no bi-curious! I'm a man's man!
Master Shake: Well not anymore! I've planted the seed of doubt!
Meatwad: You don't say that! I'm a man and if y'all need me I'll goin' be in the garage hangin' sheet rock around the engine that I'm rebuildin'.
Master Shake: Look at the way he rolls--
Meatwad: Where's my chewin' tobacco?!
Master Shake: --Just like a woman.

Frylock: Yo!

frataliens18.mp3

DP: ..what?
Frylock: Wake up, frat boy. Look, I hate to do this, but I'm gonna have to ask you to get off my lawn.
DP: Oh man. What time is it?
Frylock: It's 1.. in the afternoon.
DP: Wake and bake, dude. Wake and bake. Are you holdin'?
Frylock: No.
DP: Did William Holden come to the party?
Frylock: No.
DP: You got Holden Caulfield in there, man?
Frylock: No, we don't do that here.

DP: You know where my--where my--what is this?
Frylock: This is New Jersey. Planet Earth.
DP: Yeah, where's my bro?
Frylock: He left you here.
DP: How did my probe-- Oh man, look at my probe!
Frylock: Yeah, I know. Uh, you stuck it in that laser because you thought it was some girl's breast or something.
DP: Are you serious?
Frylock: Yeah, I am.

frataliens10.mp3

DP: The party probe!
Frylock: Oh brother.
DP: Did I feel her up, dude?
Frylock: It was a laser!
DP: Ohhh... busted!

Frylock: Okay, okay, look. it's time for you to go.
DP: Seriously? I mean, um, you don't want to play hacky sack or something?
Frylock: No! I don't!
Master Shake: DP! What's up?! You were so wasted last night, it was sick!
DP: Oh, you know it bro.
Master Shake: Hey, here you go, dude. Breakfast of champions!
DP: Oh, sweet. Want to shotgun?
Master Shake: Beam me up!

frataliens11.mp3

Master Shake: Let's go!
Frylock: Shake, what're you doin?!
Master Shake: Yo, DP. This GDI wants to know what I'm doin'. What should I tell him? That we're gonna kick his ass?!

Frylock: I'm gonna go in here and get you a ride because I want you the hell off my lawn! This is your ID?
Master Shake: What're you, a cop?
DP: Yeah, that-that's me.
Master Shake: You know you have to tell me if you are.
Frylock: Okay. Well, I'll just type in your coordinates and send you back to carnivorous howling stump monster planet. Eww, good thing you're an organ donor!
DP: Okay, okay, look. I just use that to get into bars.

frataliens12.mp3

Frylock: Okay... then what's your real name?
DP: Bros call me DP, short for donkey-puncher, get it?
Frylock: Yeah.. I do.
DP: Sometimes I'm donkey puncherelo, or D-to-the-P, or Big DP, or uh.. King Donko of Punchstania.
Master Shake: Dude, the player. Dude party! Party Dude!!! PD!!!
Frylock: No, I need your real name. What your mother calls you.
DP: Ah... You know what, just try DP.
Master Shake: Dude pal! That's what you should be... cause you're my dude...pal!
DP: Dude, your buddy here is givin' me a rash.
Frylock: He usually doesn't drink this much.
Master Shake: I out-party you!
Frylock: Shake, will you sit down?!
Master Shake: PD, I know how to throw....down! Dude, and I almost said throw up but I didn't.. I hold my booze! My booze!!!
Frylock: Yeah, this is beer number 2 for him, right?
Master Shake: But I hold boobs all day, too!
Frylock: All right!

Frylock: What's your fraternity brother's name?
DP: Zarnold Edward Quigley, born in Southernen Quasar, majoring in business, interests include beer--
Frylock: Okay! All right, all right. That's enough. All I need is his name, okay?
DP: I had to know that or they would've killed me hell week.
Master Shake: Oh, I feel floaty.
Frylock: Here we go, we're connecting with the satellite now.
DP: Dude, wait a couple hours. He's not even going to be up right now.
Master Shake: Dude, show him that sweet lung tat you got. Oh wait till you see this. This is so awesome.
DP: Had to do it on the inside or my Dad would totally kill me. Had to get wasted 'cause it hurt like eight bitches on a bitch boat!

frataliens13.mp3

Master Shake: That's so gross, and I am so gettin' one of those. I wanna be a part of you. I wish we could sew ourselves together.
DP: Dude, dude, dude. Get off my shirt, it's worth more than your ass wipe. My Dad owns a dealership!

Frylock: Hello! Is this Zarnold?
Skeeter Call me Skeeter, dude, you're blowing my rep. Lady in the house.
Frylock: Okay, well, look, uh Skeeter. I have your frat brother here and he needs to be picked up. Now.
Skeeter Oh, are you serious?
Frylock: Is that a problem or-?
Skeeter Uh, well it's like uh--
Frylock: It's like what?
Skeeter Well you know, I mean, it's so far.
Frylock: Yeah, I know.
Skeeter I mean, could you like-- I mean, if you were cool, and you're-you're cool right?
Master Shake: Yeah, if you're lookin' at me, I'm cool. Is that Skeeter? Hey Skeeter, did you score last night?
Skeeter Okay, look. Would you totally like, maybe like, you know, sorta like--
Frylock: Give him a ride?
Skeeter Oh, sweet. Thanks dude!
Frylock: Oh wait! Hello?!
DP: I can chill out for awhile. I mean, I've already flunked out but it's cool. I'm gonna work at my Dad's dealership. My Dad owns this dealership.
Frylock: I KNOW!

Narrator: His Daddy own a dealership! Damn, y'all!

DP: Sweet! How do I like, get in?
Frylock: You don't. I'll just strap you to the nose cone.
DP: Oh, convertible. Awesome. Oh, oh wait. Ah, hang on.

frataliens14.mp3

DP: Did you see like a--a little naked dude out in the street anywhere?
Frylock: Uh, yeah.. I think he's dead.
DP: Are you serious? Well, when he wakes up, make him drink.

Master Shake: DP, where are ya goin'?
DP: Oh, light it quick!
Frylock: Oh, okay.
Master Shake: Oh DP has a sweet ride. Those guys are solid dudes. I am totally rushin' them in the fall.

frataliens15.mp3

Meatwad: What was that noise?! Ahem.. like a give a bull crap. I'm a man, boy. I'm macho. I ain't no bi-curious. If I was that, how come my muscles be all big, and wearin' this spandex?
Master Shake: Right, you're full-blown gay!

frataliens17.mp3

Oglethorpe: ...and that's why I said you could not buy the roller skates.. What happened to the window? Ahhh!