back to the homepage
Aqua Teen Info





Aqua Teen Media










Other Site Things












Dusty Gozongas likes ATA
Episode 30 - Total Re-Carl

Click on the filename above the transcription to download the clip. Enjoy!



totalrecarl16.mp3

Dr. Weird's Answering Machine: Gentleman, you have reached Dr. Weird's residence. Now speak at the tone!
Deck Salesman: Hello Dr Wired Wired? Weird?
Dr. Weird: Steve, send the phone spiders.
Deck Salesman: This is Jay Edwards with Chauna (?) Construction Company. With spring here we thought you might be interested in a new deck-- Ahh! Spiders!!
Dr. Weird: I guess we're not interested!! Hahaha!




OPENING CREDITS




totalrecarl15.mp3

Frylock: Carl? Carl? Yo, Carl! Open the door!
Carl: Dammit.
Frylock: I got a gift for you.
Carl: Go away. Go away! So tired of this.. Friggin' go away, you freak.




totalrecarl1.mp3

Frylock: Carl, did you lose something behind the couch?
Carl: Yeah, I did. I lost peace and quiet! What do you need? What do you want? Can I not just live here without having to occasionally deal with you animals?!
Frylock: Well.. yeah. It's your house.
Carl: That's right it is.
Frylock: And look what I just added to it!
Carl: Oh, nice. A crapper.




Frylock: That's no ordinary toilet, Carl. That toilet is environmentally friendly. Do you know how much water is used up when you flush the toilet?
Carl: I give. What?
Frylock: 3 gallons.
Carl: Wow. What a waste. The poor children.




totalrecarl2.mp3

Frylock: This one uses highly compressed air, creating a super vacuum which completely obliterates all waste upon impact.
Carl: Oh, goodie! So I should just sorta let the neighbors know that I'm gonna be kinda, ya know, exposing myself 4-5 times a day, depending on what I eat? Maybe we could sell some tickets. Come by and take pictures! This is where I do my business from now on!




Frylock: No, no no. This is the best part Carl. Press this button and an infared privacy curtain is activated, rendering you virtually invisible!
Carl: Oh, okay. Sorta like that movie 'Predator'. Only instead of huntin' people, he's like crappin'.
Frylock: Or the Hollow Man. I mean, you choose your science fiction fantasy: You'll be living it every time you go to the bathroom!




totalrecarl18.mp3

Frylock: Go ahead, try it out.
Carl: I don't need to go right now.
Frylock: Oh, that's cool. I mean, I'll wait.
Carl: No, you won't.
Frylock: Oh, I get it. You want to be alone when you go to the... Oh, Carl. By the way, we also made you a little care package for your new adventure.
Carl: Oh boy, fiber tablets. Yum, yum.
Frylock: Oh yeah! Dip them in the stool softener, I mean, it's delicious. ...There's espresso there too if--
Carl: LEAVE!




totalrecarl3.mp3

Meatwad: Hey.. did he do number 2 yet?
Frylock: Damn! He drank all the coffee and half of those tablets--still hasn't gone.
Meatwad: Shoot, I bet he's gonna poop himself inside out! He's gonna lift right off the ground! It's gonna be like the Hulk ripping outta the back of his pants.
Frylock: Shut up, Meatwad!
Meatwad: Okay. It's gonna smell like a papermill, you know that don't ya?




Meatwad: Why are we doing this? This seems sick.
Frylock: Well, the Super-Toilet needs to be tested on humans before I can actually apply for a patent.
Meatwad: Well he ain't gonna poop in the yard. He'll go inside to do that.
Frylock: Not if his door's locked.
Carl: Hey, God! Come on, I gotta go!
Meatwad: I just can't go, ya know, when people watchin.
Master Shake: We don't need a toilet. The pile of clothes in the hallway has worked fine for years and it will continue to work!
Meatwad: I don't know who's clothes that is. Somebody ain't wearin' that again. I tell ya that.
Carl: Where's the invisible thing. Ah, screw it, I gotta do this.
FrylocK: Oh, oh. Shut up. He's about to sit down.
Master Shake: Lemme see. Lemme see! I don't wanna see that!! Nobody wants to see that! What're you trying to do? Kill me?!
Meatwad: I thought you was gonna make him invisible when he does that?
Frylock: Hell no! I can't afford to do that.
Master Shake: That has been burned into my retinas!




totalrecarl4.mp3

Frylock: Look, we'll be cool as long as the police don't drive by. Put down the phone, Shake.
Master Shake: What? I was just cleaning...the dial...it's very dirty.




Carl: Look at them bras! Heheheh.
Narrator: I ain't trying to watch Carl take no criz-nap baby.




totalrecarl5.mp3

Master Shake: He's just sitting there reading.. with his pants down.. naked, I might add. And for God's sake, burn those moles off, will ya?
Frylock: Do you realize that every time someone--
Master Shake:Yes, I know. 3 gallons! 3 gallons! Hoop-dee-damn doo.
Meatwad: Hoop-de-damn doo doo.
Master Shake: Shut up! I said that first and you copied me.
Meatwad: You did not!
Master Shake: I did too. Do. To do. See, I did it again!




Frylock: Will you shut up?! You're ruining my moment.
Master Shake: Yeah, your moment. His movement. I got a book comin out!
Carl: Okay. That wasn't too bad. Where's the frickin' flush on this thing? Ahh, oh God!
Meatwad: Oh, dizamn.




totalrecarl6.mp3

Meatwad: Gentleman, we have the technology. We can re-build him.




totalrecarl14.mp3

Meatwad: And here ya go, Carl. You may feel a little stiffness tomorrow, but that'll be natural.. Hey, just while we're on the subject, can I use your pool?
(Meatwad doing Carl): Yes, Meatwad, you may.
Meatwad: Okay. Thank you.




Frylock: So there's the head! Meatwad, I've been looking all over for that thing!




totalrecarl7.mp3

Meatwad: Oh, don't act like it's yours. It's Carl's head and he been using it to tell me I can go swimming and..uh.. Hey, can I drink some beer?
(Meatwad doing Carl): Help yourself, it's in the back.
Meatwad: And drink his beer.
Master Shake: You know what, Carl? I thank you and I will take you up on your generous offer and have some of your beers.
(Meatwad doing Carl): Shake can't have any.




Meatwad: You tell 'em Carl!
FrylocK: Look, this head can't stay attached from Carl's body for too long.
Meatwad: It's attached!
Master Shake: It ain't goin' nowhere. It's bungy'ed to the tree!
Frylock: Shut the f*** up Shake, you know what I mean!

Meatwad: What's this thing here?
Frylock: I'm keeping his head alive with electrical impulses. And the computer is able to translate his brain output into text.
Meatwad: Really?!




totalrecarl8.mp3

Meatwad: Is that an F? He's droppin' F-bombs over here!
Frylock: Don't look over here, Meatwad. These are just words you don't need to learn.
Meatwad: I'm gonna start droppin' F-bombs. Listen to this: Fart you, fart head.
Master Shake: That's not how F-bombs are dropped, you idgit!
Frylock: Oh, come on Shake!
Meatwad: Oh, the fart it is, farter. Fart all y'all, y'all go fart yourselves.




Master Shake: Hey, Chief. Where do you want this?
Frylock: You drove that thing through town?!
Master Shake: It's cool, I stayed on the shoulder the whole way.
Frylock: Well at least bring it through the back, damn!
Meatwad: Yeah, you heard'em. Bring it through the fartin' back!
Frylock: Dammit, Shake!
Master Shake: You said the back! What is this? The front now?

Frylock: All the nerves are connected. I think we're ready! Carl, can you hear me?
Carl: Wha, wha happened there.
Frylock: Well we don't know. We're just glad you're all right. I mean, you don't remember what happened, do you?




totalrecarl9.mp3

Carl: I remember some things.. I'm just not too clear on being so old.. and black. Why am I black? And where did I get this suit? It's ridiculous.




Master Shake: This is not a time for you to be picky, Carl. That's all you can get when you go to the West End.
Carl: Get it off, rip it off. What am I doing, oh God!
Frylock: Oh no! The body's rejecting the head!
Carl: Oh, ya think?! Get it off me!
Frylock: Hold on!
Meatwad: So.. did it work?
Master Shake: Of course it worked!
Frylock: No it didn't!
Master Shake: Of course it worked not at all. Which is what I was trying to say, before I was so rudely interrupted.
Frylock: Take this body back, and not throught town!




totalrecarl17.mp3

Master Shake: Mail call!!!




Master Shake: Frylock, letter for you, Meatwad... get a life! The rest, for me!
Frylock: Oh, good! The ??? organ bank!
Master Shake: Oh yeah, I dealt with these yacko's directly.
Frylock: "Dr. Frylock: While we appreciate your interest in body construction research, we cannot legally send you a quote-unquote 'buttload of organs' regardless on whether we plan on using them.
Master Shake: I didn't say 'buttload'! I said, 'assload'! Beauracrats! To think, I was polite with these people, that's the worst part.
Meatwad: What's that big ol' box outside?
Frylock: Yes! Someone did respond!
Meatwad: It's soggy. Who the fart is it from?
Frylock: Wegotussomemedicalwaste.com

Master Shake: You call this organic?!
Frylock: Well you look in the box! All they sent were eyeballs!
Master Shake: I'm not going near that box.
Frylock: Let's just see if it works.
Master Shake: Wait a minute. Before you turn him on: Do you think he'll be able to see us?
Frylock: In ways you can only imagine.




totalrecarl10.mp3

Master Shake: But look, I mean...is he gonna be able to chase us? `Cuz if I woke up lookin' like that, I would just run toward the nearest living thing and kill it.




Meatwad: Hey, ya'll. Check me out. I'm Shaun Cassidy.
Frylock: Would you put those back! They're not for you!
Master Shake: Yeah, that's a good one. What the hell are you talking about?
Meatwad: Well, he was a Hardy Boy and they was private eyes... plus he had like ten eyes in his head.
Master Shake: Okay, I'll give it to ya.
Carl: Hello, is anyone here? Why do my knees feel like they wanna tear up?
Frylock: Carl! It works!
Carl: What works?
Master Shake: All of them! Look! Get it when I say 'look'? Hahah
Frylock: Yeah, yeah. Carl, just walk over here.
Master Shake: You gotta study me, like a pupil! Like a pupil-- hahaha.
Carl: Okay, hang on a sec. Ahhhhh, oh, that hurts so bad!!
Frylock: Oh, don't worry about that Carl. Right now your feet are made of eyeballs, but they'll toughen up over time.




totalrecarl11.mp3

Carl: May I see a mirror, please?
Master Shake: All right, here ya go.. Shaun Cassidy.
Carl: Whoa, whoa whoa whoa.. Oohhhh, gross!!
Master Shake: What're you, an idiot? You've never heard of Sean Cassidy?




Carl: So that explains the breeze I've been feeling... in my thighs.
Frylock: Well we'll craft some synthetic lids, and then you'll be able to walk around normally.
Carl: Why do that? Why don't we just blow my brains out now and save yourself some time?!
Frylock: Look, Carl. This is gonna hurt, but try to take another step towards me.
Carl: Believe me, I will. I'm coming for ya. Give me a hug Fryman!
Frylock: That's kinda tight!
Carl: I'm gonna hug the breath right out of ya!
Frylock: Okay, plan C.




totalrecarl12.mp3

> Frylock: I give you the ultimate in military hardware! Complete with laser cannon, indestructible titanium exoskeleton, and motion activated plasma pulse rifles.
Master Shake: And you're gonna plug him in?!
Frylock: You're right. Damn.. What the hell was I thinking?
Meatwad: Fudge.
Frylock: That's not an F-bomb.
Meatwad: Fudge you.




Carl: Turn it left. Turn it left! I keep hittin' the same spot. Look, you're gonna break my frickin' nose.
Frylock: Oh, sorry Carl. I still haven't gotten the hang of it--
Carl: Just give me the damn thing!!




totalrecarl13.mp3

Frylock: Here, this little steering wheel makes it go left and right, and this switch here is power.
Carl: Which button sorta turns me to the lawyer and makes me sue the hell outta you?
Frylock: All right, easy Carl. Don't make me have to shut the power off.
Carl: D-d-d-don't do that. Just sorta put it on my chin. I'll frickin' steer it with my tongue.




Frylock: That...may not work. Let's just get Meatwad to drive ya home. Meatwad!
Master Shake: Get him off me, please!!!
Meatwad: Yes?
Master Shake: I didn't mean it! Everything I say about you, I mean about myself!
Meatwad: Shut up, 'fore I make it worse!
Frylock: Not in the house!!
Master Shake: No-no-no-no I need to live!!!
Meatwad: Zone in-target. Got him! Fudge you, butthole!




END CREDITS







Recent Updates


Antenna Sound Clips



Carl Wash Sound Clips



Deleted Scenes Sound Clips



Sirens Frames



Movie Frames




Billy loves us too!




the simpsons gallery

lenny leonards

support ata