Aqua Teen Adventures - Premiere Online Source for Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode 27 - The Meat Zone

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themeatzone1.mp3

Dr. Weird: Gentleman! Who stole my hairairium?!
Steve: You're what?
Dr. Weird: My hair helmet!
Steve: Oh, well. That's right there. On your head.
Dr. Weird: Oh. Bull shi--

themeatzone2.mp3

Master Shake: Look, there is only one way to get across this street: you close your eyes and just bolt out there with complete disregard for machine.
Meatwad: Well what if--What if I just kept one open and maybe tried it that way?
Master Shake: Yeah, if you think you're gonna get somewhere in life by cheating.
Meatwad: Well, yeah.
Master Shake: I mean you may as well just paint yourself yellow, run around like a maniac and call yourself Banana Man, cause that's what you're doin'!
Meatwad: What's that mean?
Master Shake: Shut up I'm trying to teach you! Now get out there Banana Man!
Meatwad: Oky doky!
Master Shake: But, wait a minute, let's wait, whoa whoa whoa. Hold on a minute, stop!
Meatwad: Yay, I did it! Look, I did it! I'm across the street.
Master Shake: Okay, yes you did. Get lucky.

Master Shake: Now, what did we learn today?
Meatwad: Pedestrian always has the right of way.
Master Shake: Yes! Except?
Meatwad: When you in the way?
Master Shake: Exactly, my boy.

themeatzone3.mp3

Master Shake: Okay, now this time we're going to cross the street the hard way.
Meatwad: The hard way?
Master Shake: Long ways!
Meatwad: All right.
Master Shake: I'll keep score!
Meatwad: Okay!
Frylock: What are y'all doin'?
Master Shake: Oh, great! Geek patrol on alert!
Meatwad: Sound the nerd alarm.
Master Shake: Look, we're not doin' jack so why don't you just go back inside and stroke your test tubes like I know you love to do.
Meatwad: Yeah, go back inside. We don't want any.
Master Shake: Geek.

Frylock: Meatwad, come on in out of the road. It's dangerous!
Meatwad: Uh uh!

themeatzone4.mp3

Meatwad: This here's my road when I's in it. And I'm in it.
Frylock: Who told you that?
Meatwad: Master Shake.
Master Shake: Ahem?
Meatwad: Oh. CAPTAIN Master Shake.
Master Shake: Of?
Meatwad: -Of Interplanetary Traffic Safety Squad & Patrol.
Master Shake: Which units?
Meatwad: All units.
Master Shake: Except?
Meatwad: Except Jupiter and Spain. Or unless otherwise noted.
Master Shake: Good! We're learning something here.
Frylock: Meatwad, come here.

Frylock: Traffic safety class is over. Forever.
Master Shake: You know, you leave now, and you're gonna get an F.
Frylock: Mm-hmm. Come on, Meatwad.
Meatwad: He's right. And if I don't pass this class, I ain't never gonna get a job crossing roads.
Frylock: But you're about to get a glass of chocolate milk.
Meatwad: Chocolate milk? Well all right!! Let's get the hell out of here.
Master Shake: No!
Frylock: Grab my fry and look both ways for cars.
Meatwad: Well, technically, that's not how the pros do it, but--

themeatzone5.mp3

Meatwad: (Having Episode) Don't drink the chocolate milk. Do not drink the chocolate milk!
Frylock: Ow, damn, Meatwad. Your grip!
Meatwad: I know. Come on, let's go get me that chocolate milk.
Frylock: But.. you just said not to drink the chocolate milk.
Meatwad: I did?! Hell, don't listen to me. Now come on.

Meatwad: Don't drink the chocolate milk.
Frylock: Ow!
Meatwad: Don't drink the chocolate milk!
Frylock: Fine, okay, fine! We won't drink any chocolate milk.
Meatwad: What? How come?
Frylock: Look, just go into the kitchen and don't touch me.
Meatwad: Don't you be giving it to me in that sippy cup. I'm an adult, and I deserve an adult glass. (Spills and cries)
Frylock: uh-oh. I don't think so. No, no, this milk is expired, Meatwad.
Meatwad: Mm-mm. I like it when it's chunky. It's spreadable, and it's edible.
Master Shake: How could he have known this milk was spoiled?
Frylock: Well, Shake, it's been in there 18 months.
Master Shake: But he knew!
Meatwad: Look, fellas, it doesn't matter. The point is I still am gonna eat it.
Frylock: Well, you're not gonna get it, Meatwad, because this is going right in the garbage.
Meatwad: Wait. Hang on.

themeatzone6.mp3

Meatwad: (Having Episode) Don't open the trash. Do not open the trash. Don't open the trash!
Master Shake: Oh, no! What's in the trash?
Meatwad: Soon you will know.

Frylock: Well, I guess we'll just have to find out. Ew!
Meatwad: It's stinky, isn't it? I knew it was gonna be stinky.
Master Shake: He has the gift. He can see the future.
Frylock: Sometimes trash does stink, okay, Shake?
Master Shake: But he predicted it. Surely you're not implying that was coincidence.
Meatwad: No, ut was "The Prophecy," starring Christopher Walken.
Master Shake: He wasn't in that at all.
Meatwad: Yeah, he was.
Master Shake: Look, you must tell me! when am I getting some?
Meatwad: Okay.
Master Shake: But, you know, don't actually touch me. You got germs.
Meatwad: Okay.
Master Shake: Just grab on to this thing.
Meatwad: Okay.

themeatzone7.mp3

Master Shake: (In Future) Ooo, french maid! You didn't expect me home from the whipped cream store so soon, did you? And who's your lady friend? (Hears knocks on door) Wait! Don't open, there's someone in here. I--I'm wrapping presents. (In present) What did she say? What was I doing? Was she hot?
Meatwad: I'm not at liberty to discuss it.
Frylock: Because you don't know, do you?
Meatwad: Oh, I know. And it's sexy.
Master Shake: I'll buy that. So long as everybody else finally knows I got it goin' on.

Master Shake: So I got to go in your room now. I'm gonna be in there a long time, and I'm not to be disturbed.
Meatwad: Hey, watch this here.
Master Shake: Whoo! french maid? Wait! Don't open. There's someone in here. I--I'm wrapping presents.
Meatwad: I know what you're doing in there, and I'm telling Frylock.
Master Shake: He knows! He has the gift! But he's about to lie to you.
Frylock: Oh, please. We all know what you do in there, Shake. You do it about 5-6 times a day.
Master Shake: And what exactly is it that you think I do?
Frylock: I think you read 'Butt Frenzy'.
Master Shake: No, I don't. but how do you know? You have the gift! I'm surrounded by shiners. Come on!
Frylock: Where we goin'?
Master Shake: To exploit him. Okay. I need the numbers for the jersey midnight fantasy pick 7, so latch on.

themeatzone8.mp3

Meatwad: (Having Episode where Master Shake beats him with backscratcher) No, don't hit me with that.
Master Shake: I'll wail on you all I like. How's it taste, motha?
Meatwad: Okay. That was more the future of the backscratcher and not really you, so let's just take this and break it into a bunch of pieces.
Master Shake: Are you sure?

Meatwad: And let me touch your hand.
Master Shake: I don't know..
Meatwad: I'll be as gentle as a lamb--
Master Shake: Fine, but I'm against it.
Meatwad: --that works out with weights.

themeatzone9.mp3

Meatwad: (Having Episode) One! Two!
Master Shake: My fingers, dammit!
Meatwad: Three? Four?
Master Shake: Come on, this hurts!
Meatwad: K..5?
Master Shake: K..5?
Meatwad: Yes, K5. Six. Hey, how you doin'?
Master Shake: Who're you talkin' to? Come on, I just need one more, will you just?
Meatwad: Oh, oh yeah. The last one's 7.

Master Shake: All right. That's what I was gonna put before I talked to you. Just so we're clear here on the distribution of funds.
Frylock: Well, gee, that's interesting. Those are the same exact numbers in your learn to count numbers book.
Meatwad: You're right. that is very interesting.
Master Shake: What are you saying, that he's not right? Well, how do you explain the trash stinking?
Frylock: Well, I guess I can't.
Master Shake: Or need I remind you of the milk incident?
Frylock: I'll tell you this much right now. The numbers are not 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7.

TV: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7! In order are the jersey midnight fantasy pick 7 numbers. What are the chances, Donna?
Master Shake: Oh, for frig! Damn it! Hey Donna, how about shoot me in the head?!
Frylock: Come on, it could have been a coincidence, Shake.
Master Shake: Where is he?! 'cause I predict that his brain is about to be yanked out right now.
Frylock: You were the one who picked the different numbers.
Master Shake: Because you said that he would--with the-- you're the brains that's coming out.
Meatwad: Behold, it is I. I bestow upon you my dirty diapee. But there is another. Who among you shall embark upon such a quest? To, you know, peel it off the ceiling. It's stuck up there.
Frylock: Shut up. You're not Yoda.
Meatwad: Yes, I foresaw that you would say that. But give forth to me your fry, red one, and secrets told shall be.
Frylock: Oh, you think you can see the future, huh? Let's dance!
Meatwad: Don't leave the house! Do not leave the house!
Master Shake: Ooh! You heard the man. Uh, hey, where do you think you're going?
Frylock: I'm leaving the house, because ain't nothing gonna happen to me.
Master Shake: Well, so are we. And guess what? He knew.
Meatwad: Yep. I'm pretty amazing.
Frylock: The dog blew up again.

themeatzone10.mp3

Master Shake: Hey, Carlac, what's up?
Carl: Hey, I thought we decided not to call me that?
Master Shake: I wouldn't normally, to your face, but I'm feeling lucky!

Master Shake: How much you got in your wallet?
Carl: No, no, no.
Master Shake: And what would you say if I told you I could triple it?
Carl: And I would say that I've heard this before.
Master Shake: What, the oil stain?
Carl: Yeah. the oil stain.
Master Shake: Tell me that that does not totally look like Jesus. And people would have paid to see it if this were the south, Carl.
Carl: Yeah, well, the sign and the poles cost money, Shake. And I still got about 1,000 of these in my living room. We're hoping they ascend into heaven, 'cause no one's buying them.
Master Shake: Well how about in planes?
Carl: They don't fit planes, neither!
Master Shake: They should. we designed them.
Carl: Oh, man. You are getting me so angry.
Master Shake: Look, let's forget that, okay? I've got something. There's science behind this and legend and-- poke. Hey, get over--
Meatwad: Hey.
Master Shake: Well show him the damn future. Hurry up.
Meatwad: Prepare to see what cannot be seen. Wait. Hang on. shoot.
Master Shake: Um. what's the problem? We have a--we don't a--do we have a problem?
Meatwad: Let me see--Let me see your other hand.
Carl: No.
Meatwad: Okay.
Master Shake: What's happening?
Meatwad: What the hell?
Master Shake: What's it doing?
Carl: It's pissing me off.
Meatwad: No, it's about to. Just chill out.
Master Shake: Well, kick it in. Let's get the future going.
Carl: I'm not gonna pay you to do that.
Master Shake: Give us a minute, Carl. will you hit it?
Meatwad: No, it's-it's coming.
Master Shake: Can I get a little professionalism, please.
Carl: I tell you what, try the--try the middle finger.
Meatwad: Um, shoot.
Master Shake: I've asked you nicely. This is going in your file. Don't make me go to the higher-ups about this.
Meatwad: Here it comes.

themeatzone11.mp3

Meatwad: The Giants--the Giants are number 1! The Giants are number 1...is the future. Your future.
Carl: Hey, man. That's not a prediction. That's a fact of life. You tell me something I don't know.
Master Shake: You better do it, and quick.

Meatwad: I didn't say jack to him about having oil on his property.
Master Shake: Well, are you prepared to tell him that? It's a little late for your concern. Where were you when he was putting--
Meatwad: You're the one that told him.
Master Shake: Because you were the one who was about to blow it! You said there's plenty of oil in dallas; they shouldn't have it all. And, by the way, "Dallas"-- that's on TV.
Frylock: So, Meatwad predicted oil, huh?
Master Shake: We're not telling you. You're toast, baby. Hey, I'm talking to a dead man here.
Meatwad: Don't leave the house!
Frylock: Will you get off me?
Meatwad: Do not leave the house.
Frylock: Well, in that case, I'll stay out here as long as I please.
Meatwad: Okay. That's fine. This here's a good bed. And this here's a good cheese.
Frylock: what are you doing?!
Meatwad: Predicting the future?
Frylock: No. You're messing up my bedspread.
Meatwad: Oh, yeah, I know well look, hey, I mean-- Do not look in the room, do not look in the room! See ya.
Frylock: Uh-uh. No, you don't. Hey! Man, what the--? You've been eating all my caulk.
Meatwad: Caulk? No. this is cheese.
Frylock: No! It's highly toxic industrial adhesive used to connect electronic circuitry to steel. It's caulk.
Meatwad: And it's good, too.
Frylock: Listen to this, okay? Avoid human contact. May cause dizziness, nausea, and an ability to think you can see the future, but you can't.
Meatwad: Well, what's it say about finding oil?
Frylock: Nothing!
Meatwad: Uh-oh.
Master Shake: Whoa! We're rich! Black gold! Texas tea!
Carl: Oh man!

themeatzone12.mp3

Carl: Is it supposed to stink like this, or--?
Master Shake: Yeah, that's why they call it 'crude' Carl.
Carl: No, it's not. We hit my septic tank, you jackass.
Master Shake: Oh, so you're storing extra oil in your septic tank? I'm on to you!
Carl: You're wearing my dinner!
Master Shake: Ohh, gross!

Master Shake: You eat corn? I hate corn!